emo :: mood swings

Saturday, June 23, 2007, 5:05 PM

Hey YO!

Hey YO guyz!! i will be oversea for these 9 days.. so wont get to blog or update myself.. i will be flying off tonight 23June2007.. take really good care of yourself buddies!!! will be back at 2July07 ^^... flying off to sydney... TAKE CARE!!! ^^ will miss all of you all who read my blog!!!

Raymond says: "Take care buddy! ^^"

Saturday, June 16, 2007, 1:41 AM

A trip...

Maybe i was too tired, when i was taking a bath just now, i actually took the face form and apply them on my body... -_-"

Went to School for project today.. did not really get anything done during the project.. so i went to the Orchestra to meet my friend after that, as they will accompany mi to go submit a Form to "ngee Ann Kongsi" hoping to get that award.. cause got $$ lol... This are some photos taken during Orchestra...

Look at how Xinger at the right is so serious teaching Sherryl Soh at the left...

Gals playing percussion, wow, so cool!! haha

So Sherryl, Liyi and Wanyi, accompany me to submit the form... That place was located at somewhere near Dhoby and they had to accompany to walk to that place under the hot sun.. so i had to thank them sincerly for their effort... ^^ lol..

Next we went to plaza Sing... and decided to watch movie.. however lik ended up going to Singapoer river, sit down and chit chat.. it was really quite a nice day... However, we really walk alot today and talk alot... This whole day lasted from.... about 1530 till 2300.. wow it was long!!

Here are some picz we took... at Co and at the Plaza Sing.. looks quite stupid...

She look so -_-" in that "earPhone" and still wan mi to take her photo..

And HERE are CO picz... Photo Gazing....

Wanyi and Mi..

ER Mei Jie and Mi

. .... ... . .... ...

Eunice and mi...

Liyi and mi de pic is on her digital cam.. lol...

a.... ok that should be all for todae.. good nite.. and thank you friends for accompanying mi todae!! ^^

Monday, June 11, 2007, 11:24 PM

Happi Ending?

Having a very terrible time planning the intensive music training camp proposal.. at last today is the last day of the camp.. and all had end... despite very little ppl cooperate with mi in this camp, and i felt so useless as this camp but i am still relieve and happy that i had clear one stuff.. to mi this camp was consider not quite successful, felt useless as many do not want to follow my timetable which i planned for so long.. but what can i do, it's their choice. no matter what they do, as long as all members of NYPCO are happy and that they are consistent in music i am happi ler ^^... another thing i felt so useless is that, why do i get so afraid when it is a solo part i am playing.. why?!!.. why i can't play the solo well.. after 3yrs of practise in erhu.. i still can't do well.. Looked down on myself... wasted my family's money in erhu personal lesson.. maybe just lik what my friends said, i am just plain stupid.. LOL.. thats why i played so lousy in solo... and get so nervous when playing solo.. useless... just to tell my dearest friends who read my blog post.. i am not emoing or what in this post.. this is purely just how i felt bout myself.. ^^.. felt so much better letting it out.. may not get the time to update again.. maybe? may be not...

Saturday, June 09, 2007, 12:48 AM

New SOngs

This is quite an old songs by a band A1... I quite like this song.. so would like to introduce this song to people who comes to my blog.. just click at the link "Old School Shoes Links" go under music player and play.. ^^ hope you guys like it.. ^^

Friday, June 08, 2007, 12:39 AM

A request By a Friend ^^

here a request from you to show you.............. a pic that i want to descript myself.. LOL..

lol.. dun mind ar.. haha... ^^

Wednesday, June 06, 2007, 11:49 PM

reply to a person...

JUST SHUT THE FK UP!

First Met, first impression-

Met xx friend today.. well he was kind of fun, so guess xx had met her Mr right ler.. so xx i agree to 许配 (xu pei) you to him.. HAHA.. i am too bright for them today, went with them to see the voice out concert and the sound system was so terrible!! luckily there's samantha to accompany mi.. else i will really be too bright!! LOL.. and CONGRATULATION Geneviene for getting FIRST!! so happy for her!! yeah!!!

Tuesday, June 05, 2007, 11:55 PM

Whatever.. i will spill it out then..

Let me make it clear to you, i am not unknowingly treating people mean or anything.. i know how am i treating other people, and i dun need you to teach mi how to do things. thank you. And so sorry that you cannot treat mi like transparent because i am in your project group, why must you stick to this group, you are making mi so difficult to do things. i cannot even concentrate on my project. i thought of switching group, but a pity, they thought it was because i want to avoid you. but the answer is no, cause i dun want you to affect my project. why do you just wants to stick with ppl who benefit you.. and not stick to ppl who treats you well.. yes this is part of my thinking.. but.. just reflect to yourself.. another thing i wanna tell you is that, i dun see you treating other ppl well.. in fact, speaking the truth i find it disgusting to see you treating ppl well, which was lik "acting".. If possible, i wish you will disappear from CSCO, from NYPCO and from my class!!! else it will be mi who disappear just as you wishED.. i dun see happiness with you around, you are affecting mi.. c'mon right now i am also wasting my time replying your post.. which i am suppose to be studying.. i kept on telling ppl i want to study.. in the end i study nothing.. thinking of just your name makes mi dun wanna study and wanna sleep.. or watch tv.. so i cannot help not thinking of you appearing in my mind, because you are everywhere within my life.. There's going to be two tests, considered impt.. and what am i doing now? not onli i affect your studies k, you also affect mine.. you made mi think that you are ambitious and your solo doesn't sounds pres ant to mi.. despite its nice for others but not for mi.. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I USED THE MOST TERRIBLE TONE I HAD EVER USED TO PEOPLE. this is not to get your 同情 but just to let you know, that my eyes are watery after posing this... pls make it be the last time my eyes are lik tt.. and also dun post anymore at your blog.. and i will not go to your blog unnecessarily just to find out what's in your mind.. you can hate mi now.. cause i am just treating you in this manner.. sorry again if i affected your solo.. but since you think that i am a stranger.. just treat that you are blowing for the ppl you know... or you can treat mi as worst than a piece of shit i dun mind anymore.. and i dun think you are helping yourself... GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, June 04, 2007, 8:23 PM

Nothing Turns out well

I may not get to have the trip...
Half dead, wanna went home straight to die.. On my way in the bus.. Liyi called and ask mi accompany Amelia and her for dinner.. So i asked xinxian who was on board the bus with mi to accompany me..
Went to a coffee shop near hougang plaza.. and Liyi forced mi to eat the chicken skin -_-"

Nah.. proof... evidence..

here's a pic of the Cheerful in full moon de Amelia..

Next is Liyi and xinxian's back view.. dotz... her back view like GHost...

dun feel happy.. hope to cheer up by myself soon, i am also very sensitive to the words ppl speak to mi now. feel even more stress.. lee Yi xianz (Kanasai person!).. ARGH!! Felt comforted abit because i still got Angie, Daniel, Liyi, Xinger.. "xinxian?", Jia Wen, Chia Sin... and the rest.. of the NYPCO members who are standing up for mi.. ^^ (Sorry if i forgot to mentions some names, it does mean i forget you.. but is too much ppl to mentions.. i just hate mentioning names..)
Ok and that should be all.. may update again bah..

Sunday, June 03, 2007, 11:38 PM

-Lost Control-

Just dun know why everything you do irks mi.. i also dun know.. pls dun make mi to be lik so evil, i am just like anyone out there.. a human being i got feelings too.. indeed i get disgusted, angry, irritated and even dun like to hear a sound coming out from you.. what had you done to mi?? i felt so evil, why must you do this?? why must it be you who make mi feel disgusted, irritated and angry.. and made mi lost control... I thought this kind of situation would end.. but.. you made me hope it would not end... I remembered you told mi you do not like to attend concerts, and i was wondering why must you come?? you spoilt my mood.. and i spoilt your mood too... was relieve that you did not tag along to eat.. else i maybe the one taking MRT home.. i got difficulty talking to you.. even if it is political reason, i would also try not to talk to you.. cause i dun wan to talk to you or see you.. you feel terrible??.. yes i always suan you always hurt you hor, but i just cannot forget somethings... Please dun be too good to other ppl, it really made mi think that you are just acting.. maybe.. YEs YES, i am evil.. again i said stupidd things.. i said things not suppose to be said.. but this is my post.. can't i just throw everything out.. My test is coming, and indeed, you have made mi lost all my concentration in my test.. and even my music.. dun believe? i am suppose to be studying today.. but because i had a small discussion with joanne about you, and i really lost my mood to study.. not because joanne sae bad things.. she was nice to mi and she talked nicely to mi.. but its the mentioning of your name... i just touch my book and went to bed till now.. so in the end i read nothing.. and study nothing.. dun even felt like touching my erhu today.. my Year1 self is losing, i become lazy and almost bonkers... i may be mean to let you taste your own medicine, but i am human.. i am also affected by you.. and dun anyhow sae die die die... if you think its so fun to die, then why do you still come to school and study like mad..
for my buddies who read this, i know i am mean, so evil, but please understand... i am just typing out all my feeling to this post.. i am sure you all know what kind of person am i...
-Stress To The Core- who dun emo.. and why must emo hit mi.. stupidd... i am so stupidd.. yes it is correct that i am scolded stupidd...

Is Heaven Creating a Prank on mi??

Went to see SYCO concert today, and saw some one i don't wanna see.. Said some mean things and gotten scolded by liYi.. it just seems that whatever i do is in the wrong like that.. no one is there to stand by me at all.. sometimes even liyi also dun wanna stand by mi... my big sis is busy so i dun wanna trouble her.. so i felt like i am all alone standing by myself.. felt sour in my heart, i may be straight forward but thats what in my mind.. at least i am frank, but it seems that whatever i sae was lik i am in the wrong.. does it means i have to keep eveything by myself?? just wanna be frank and let out everything, and its so difficult.. trying not to be emo, as i got irritated by this word "emo".. but i just feel emo, when it seems lik all is my fault.. Who will stay wit mi? who will believe mi? and why everyone can sae mi, but i cannot sae back?? WHY?? do i have to be bullied lik before?? i told myself i have to stand firm.. and no more history is going to repeat itself.. no more!! ARGH!!
went to Lao Pa Sa, and ate a Roti Muturbak which is so small and not tasty at all, and cost 5 to 6 dollars each... and cheered up a little by the drink store uncle when i ask for the drink "Whatever"..
i said: "Uncle give mi Whatever..", the uncle took a bottle of Qoo and put infront of mi.. i gave a -__-" face, paid the money and walk away with the drink laughing.. he really gave mi Whatever..

Here a pic of the drink.. LOL...

However was still quite moody.. and feeling bluez.. so took out Sherryl's hand and my hand and gave a shot... to compare the buises we had.. LOL.. stupid.. can't imagine if we really stead.. WAH KAO A!!! i will become pokadots liao ar!! She so chor lor and have hongkong legs.. sia lar.. LOL..

Till i reach home.. i still don't feel so happy.. always thought that going out with friends will free mi from stress, however words from friends is even more stressful.. i better study harder, i am lagging behind.. WHAT HAPPEN TO ME!! RAYMOND CHUA YOU ARE A STUPID PERSON, YOU ARE SO SO SO STUPID!!! GO AND DIE LAR!!! ARGH!!!!